Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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