Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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