Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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