Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
