Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
