Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
