i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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