I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Randomize
