i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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