she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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