wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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