she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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