I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
