i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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