So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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