Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
he had hair everywhere except his balls
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP