My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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