thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
