I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
