I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Congratulations! We have a period
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