im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
