nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
