Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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