She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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