Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
