Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
