I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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