So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
