I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Less talking, more tequila
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
