She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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