I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
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I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
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Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him