My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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