I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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