I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I want her autograph on my taint
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
