my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
