I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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