Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Randomize