We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
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i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
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I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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