ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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