bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence