right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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