He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
