Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
