sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize