She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
