Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
