The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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