Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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