were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
