One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
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