i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
