# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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